Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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