So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize
