Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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