Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
