who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
