Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I need a burrito and a hug.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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