Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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