Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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