guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
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