Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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