College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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