Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
