Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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