Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
