508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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