"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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