My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize
