I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
