Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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