You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
