i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
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