I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize