i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
