I don't think brook has ever known best
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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