Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Randomize
