I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
