I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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