Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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