No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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