I want to have your abortion
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
i've created a new STD.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
