Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
