how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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