Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
