playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
