I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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