PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
