I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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