I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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