TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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