Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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