i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
