i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Randomize
