go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
