She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Randomize
