glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
