He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
