Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
