I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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