Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
