And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
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