and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize